Penis size - why does it matter to men?
Working on the hypothesis that women want sex with a man they love, like and respect rather than a man with a big penis, but in the absence of all the emotional stuff, they'll take the sensation and erotic excitement provided by a big penis, the question remains why penis size is so important to men.
Sex can be a spiritual affair when two people feel a connection; at the other end of the spectrum it can just be a matter of physical sensation, a penis in a vagina routine that is more or less satisfying for the man and the woman (although, as a man, I've always found it to be very satisfying!)
Does it make any difference to me that my penis is actually smaller than average? I'd say no, at least not as far as sex is concerned.
I've never felt that sex was lacking because of my penis size, either in the spiritual sex I've enjoyed with certain women or in the purely physical pleasure of sex with women I just agreed to go to bed with for the sheer pleasure of making love.
And the subject of my penis size has never come up in any of these relationships, which could of course be because the women concerned didn't care - or because they were sparing my feelings at the lack of physical pleasure when my small penis disappeared into their vaginas.
(Though, as one man pointed out on another page of this site, maybe the women who complain about penis size are the ones with a loose capacious vagina! Now there's an alternative idea worth exploring....)
However, I'd prefer to put the lack of comments on my size down to my skill as a lover.
Making sure that my partner has as many orgasms as she wants through oral sex before entering her is great recipe for success - it takes her mind off the question of size.
Besides which, if she's extremely wet, then any size penis is probably going to feel loose inside her.
Now, here's the interesting thing. Even though I know my the size of my penis doesn't matter to the women with whom I go to bed, it still matters to me - especially when it's flaccid.
What concept of the penis have I got in my head that means I would like a bigger penis?
The obvious answer is that in some way we all believe penis size equals masculinity. The true measure of a man, as it were, is the size of his packet.
Well, if that were true, how would we measure a man's masculinity from it? We couldn't, since penises are not on general display.
This could only be a personal thing.
But if a man comes to a conclusion about his masculinity based on his perceptions of his own penis size, then he's likely to be way out....because most men think their penis is much smaller than it actually is.
But hey, maybe that's why most men aren't very masculine?
Maybe the answer is much simpler - that men are very competitive and that penis size is just another way in which we compare themselves to each other and form ourselves into a hierarchy of dominance?
That seems more credible, since men are indeed both competitive and hierarchically orientated. But the same problem exists with this argument as exists with the one above - penises are not on general display.
So what is this male obsession with penis size all about?
Think for a moment of making love. If you've ever resisted the urge to thrust and lain still with your partner, you've probably experienced a tremendous build-up of sexual energy, most of which expresses itself in an incredibly strong urge to pump hard - to fuck her, to penetrate her to the depths of her being, to get as deeply inside her cunt as you can.
Is that Nature telling us to pump our semen at the level of her cervix, so that the chance of impregnating her is as high as possible? If so, the instinctual desire for a bigger penis would be quite natural and understandable - it's a symbol of reproductive success.
Now, take this a step further. If the fundamental purpose of all if us is to reproduce (a biological certainty), and that happens as male and female energy come together, then the big penis represents not only reproductive success but the ability to take a woman, to fill her with male energy, to dominate her completely.
The deeper and fuller her vagina is with my penis, the more of a man I feel myself to be.
And therefore my desire for a large penis stems from my desire to express my male power in the most fundamental way - when taking a woman sexually.
In that place of sexual expression, stripped bare of civilized niceties, where the profound masculine meets the profound feminine, penis size becomes the ultimate expression of masculinity and male power.
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Updated November 11, 2016