Penis size - questions and answers from the penis size discussion groups on the web

Question: What happened to make you realize your penis was smaller than average?

Answer: In the toilets at school - like so many other guys, I was pissing next to someone who decided to take a peek, and then, having seen the size of my penis, announced to the world how small my cock was.

Several other guys got their knobs out to compare (typical males!) but no-one picked on me about it.

Answer 1: In the gym class - that other curse of small penis-ed guys. A bully stuck his hand down my underpants (probably just looking for a thrill for himself) and then announced to the class that I had a small cock.

In fact he told them I had a half inch penis. That was unfortunately true in the flaccid state, but he also told them I had no pubic hair, which was not true.

From then on my life was full of fear that I would be exposed and I avoided the possibility whenever I could. But I wasn't especially assertive when I was a kid and in any event it's hard to get excused from gym class every week.

I didn't have the intelligence to go and see the doctor - indeed, I thought I was completely on my own with my fears and doubts about my penis. I just suffered in silence until gym class became optional.

Answer 2: I think it must have happened to many guys as it happened to me. I was in the scouts, and the usual adolescent curiosity about how people compare led to a session of show and tell - i.e. show your penis and tell the others how big it was when erect.

I refused to take part, so, scenting a story, the others held me down, tied up my hands with rope and then pulled off my shorts and underwear.

Needless to say, I was pretty small, so they all started whooping "We got a one incher here!" It never really went any further, but I lived with the humiliation of it for years.

Oddly enough, they later did the same thing to a guy whose penis was enormous - six inches at the age of fourteen, and he was equally embarrassed.

Answer 3: My brother caught me masturbating at the age of fourteen and proceeded to gleefully tell me how small my penis was. He didn't get his own out to share his size, but his penis has obviously has grown normally whereas mine never did.

Answer 4: An eight grade trip to the swimming pool - everyone had to change in public. Oh dear. My penis was much smaller than everyone else's and they also had loads of pubic hair. It gave me a complex about changing in public which has lasted to this day.

Answer 5: I realized when I went into the military and had to shower with the other guys. I had somehow never known until then that my penis was much smaller than an adult male's ought to be.

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Answer 6: I shared a room with my brother and it was hard to miss his giant penis.

Answer 7: Why boys have to be so goddam cruel about this I'll never know, especially the ones who are supposed to be your friends.

I thought I was normal size, because we never showered together and we never saw each other naked at school. Then I went on a camping trip when I was fifteen with a friend who I just assumed was the same size as me.

We dropped our pants at the same time, and his penis flopped out in all its glory - about four inches and pretty thick.

He got it hard and I think it must have been about eight inches, I was about two flaccid and four erect at the time (and not much more now!)

This would not have been so bad had he not then gone on to tell everyone about it, so much so that I became known as "baby cock".

Answer 8: I was 12 and waiting for a friend in his room while he showered before we went to a party. When he came out his penis was four inches long - an adult man's penis. I knew I was only an inch and it was very hard for me to keep calm suddenly realizing how small and immature I was.

After that I could never go in the showers again, and Gym class was a terrible experience - and sometimes a humiliating one as well. I avoid public changing rooms to this day and only recently (six years after I left school) have I begun to swim again.

Answer 9: I was in the scouts with a friend who was fourteen and I was twelve. He was seven and a half inches, I was only four, but he never teased me about it.

 In fact he was my first lover - he started by masturbating between my thighs lying behind me in the bunk - that was the first time I ever saw, felt or smelled come.

Next day we were hiking, stopped to piss, and he got hold of my penis and fondled himself and me into an erection, then masturbated me until I came - before then I had no idea I could ejaculate.

Anyhow, although he never teased me about my penis size, when I went in the showers on this same trip with everyone else, they spotted my small penis and laughed at it. This was because it retracts into my body when soft, so I decided I would always try and have a partly erect penis in the showers.

The problem was that sometimes it got fully hard - and even then it was only four inches long - which gave them something else to laugh at.

I was traumatized by this, and it's fair to say that to this day I have avoided sex with a lot of people because of fear about how my penis would be received.

Answer 10: I'm very sad you had the experiences you describe above. I think at four inches you are certainly a bit smaller than average but you are still very much in line for a lover - I am the same size and my penis has never attracted any adverse attention from a lover.

I certainly have never been turned down by anyone because of my penis size, and I don't think any relationship I have had has split up because of the issues of my penis being too small. This is true for both my relationships with men and women.

I think what has happened to you is that you were traumatized by the shock of this experience and you've never gotten over the blow to your confidence.

I know it is hard but you have to get out there and work hard to overcome the feelings of self doubt that you are left with.

Seeing your first boyfriend naked was hopefully an erotic experience which you enjoyed - or was it just something that was abusive and added to your trauma? - but you were negatively conditioned because his penis was so much larger than yours.

Then you had the problem in the showers when other boys laughed at the size of your erection; that cannot have helped you gain much confidence.

Maybe what you need now is good lover who appreciates you for the other qualities you have besides the size of your penis. Remember that penis size doesn't determine how much of a man you are - and it is certainly not a measure of masculinity.

Answer 11: Thanks for your response but my situation is a bit more complicated than that. I am basically gay, although at college I had sex with as many women as men - and that was lots.

But the women liked me, probably because I am a nice guy who listened to them, while the gay guys went to bed with me once and then never returned.

This was the seventies when penis size was a thing of major importance in the gay world - it was celebrated (read Larry Kramer's Faggots if you want to understand this).

In other words, you are right it didn't matter about penis size to women (at least not to the ones I met), but it mattered a heck of a lot to the gay guys - and I felt the rejection every time I had sex with them, or at least I felt their disappointment. That is what I think I have never got over.

Answer 12: That's all interesting, but does penis size really matter to gay guys that much nowadays? I go to a nude beach in Florida where 90% of the guys are gay - and they tell me I'm good looking and likeable. and I get hit on quite a lot - they stare at my cock a lot too, which actually has to be one of the smallest on the beach at one inch.

I reckon (and so does my urologist) that 95% of men are bigger than me. That's confirmed by my wife, who's a nurse and sees lots of penises in her line of work.

A lot of the guys on the beach say they are attracted to me because of my confidence - and that my small penis becomes attractive to them because I am attractive to them.

So if you could try being proud of what you've got rather than taking the view that you'll be rejected because of it, you might find things turn around for you. Be proud of your penis and think how you can use it!

Answer 12:
Yeah, well, when I was 14 I was taken skinny dipping by my two brothers who were both hung like my dad (who I saw naked at the same time - he was hung like a horse, and so were they).

When I refused to join them, they ripped down my trunks and - it's painful even now to recall - started laughing about the size of my cock. They went round calling me "pussy boy" and "tiny prick", and then told everyone we knew about their "pussy boy" brother.

I avoided all public locker rooms and gym class and never changed clothes in front of anyone again. To this day I have hardly had any sex, only having been with one woman.

Answer 13: I didn't even start to grow until was 15 (my penis, I mean) and when I had to referee a class of 14 year olds, it was impossible for me to get undressed in front of them - they all had adult sized penises and mine was still tiny.

Since then I have been told (nicely or not) that I am small by three people - a gay friend who had sex with me when I was 16 (I thought, what the hell, I just want to enjoy coming with someone else, and threw caution to the winds - fortunately he enjoyed sucking my very small penis)....oh, I should tell you my penis is four inches long and four and a quarter around - it never grew any more, LOL!

The next was a women at college who was a virgin, and for whom my small penis was an advantage I think as it seemed to cause her no pain when she lost her virginity. It didn't cause me any pain either because I don't think she'd ever seen a man's penis before, so she didn't say anything about the size.

Lastly, a urologist who I went to for a fungal infection on my glans, tried to stretch my flaccid penis and found it basically didn't! LOL.

But I've never had any trouble finding sexual partners and enjoying sex, so I'd definitely say that penis size is much less important than overall confidence.

I think adult men are much more tolerant of small penis size than adolescents, who are still in the competitive phase and want to humiliate others to feel better about their own failings. So try again, and with adult men you may be surprised how you are accepted without comment.

Answer 14: I Probably knew while I was a small boy, but I found out definitely at primary school when I was 11 and changing after swimming.

My penis had done its usual thing of retracting into my body, and a boy who was looking around (there's always one penis-peeper) laughed and said something like "Your penis has disappeared - don't worry it'll pop out when you go for a pee." That was my first self-conscious moment in the changing rooms. It didn't get any better after that.

When I was 13 a boy with a huge penis whipped my towel away, shouting "Show us what you've got!"

When he saw my small half inch penis under the towel, he just laughed and said "Is that it?" The humiliation was total and excruciating, and I felt numb with shock and shame - and of course it confirmed what I knew inside myself, which was that I wasn't normal.

And from that day onwards I wasn't. It took a lot of expensive therapy to get back to a place where I could even feel slightly confident about having a normal relationship with a woman.

For me, gay men with small cocks were a life saver - I have had many sexual adventures with men like that, and I thank each and every one of them.

Answer 15: I was staying with a friend who had older brothers. You can guess what happened - they saw me naked and took it out on me.

They didn't attack their brother who was the same size as me, for some reason. Perhaps he'd had his dose of torture already.

Anyway, four years later I saw him naked and he had grown enormously - his penis was the same size as his brothers'. Mine however, was still the same size it was then.

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Updated November 11, 2016